[Austin-ghetto-list] jaxon's rant, part 8+

[jaxon41]

Hi Folks--

Okay, in part 7 we were starting to see a xenophobic thread develop.  Kinda
like that funny teevee commercial a few years ago where grizzled cowboys
were squatting around a campfire, only to discover in horror that their hot
sauce (chili powder?) was made in "NEW YAWK CITY!?!"  Unacceptable-- we need
Pace brand from El Paso or whatever it was.  What do Yankees know about hot
sauce/chili powder??  Not a hekk of a lot, most Texans would argue, and
maybe Ventura's literary GLOP, his "food for the brain," falls into the same
category.

When it became quite clear that the Chronicle wasn't going to treat me
fairly, I wrote letters to both LB & NB on 23 Oct (same day as the foregoing
letters-to-editor were printed).  This time I sent both, instead of just
venting my anger to keep my sanity like earlier.  Seems like I mailed these
items before picking up that issue of the Chron, as I generally post things
on the mailbox in the wee-morning hours before hitting the sack; I'm not
awake and out & about till late afternoon.  This has been my schedule for
years, and it's one I'm comfortable with.  Who needs to squint at the hot
Texas sun while in its blazing fury?  A lifetime of these squints has
already cut some deep furrows into my brow, and I don't need more of them,
weird warts, skin cancer, etc.  They don't call Anglo-Celts like me
"rednecks" for nothing.  I used to tan easily but now I just turn a painful
bright pink.  The Texas sun is not kind to us Scotch-Irish folks over the
long term and never has been:

Louis Black, @ Austin Chronicle
PERSONAL

I see that you will not change your mind about printing my response to
Ventura's slander, despite the many letters of outrage you've been receiving
on this subject (unsolicited on my part, I assure you).  Hey, it's your
paper so do whatever you please!

But Louis, this little exercise of editorial dictatorship is going to turn
and bite you on the ASS.  As you may have figured out by now, in running
this malicious review & then choosing to stand behind it, you've lost not
only my friendship but the RESPECT of the entire Austin creative community.
Thanks  to the Internet (comix@indra.com, but keep it a secret), both V's
review & your despicable editorial standards are now being judged by a
national audience as well.  Good luck; you're going to need it.  jaxon

So, I'm thinking Louis Black is a hopeless case.  Screw him, but he's just
the editor, right?  Maybe he only gets a fat, regular paycheck and doesn't
own a sizable chunk of Chron ownership, stock, whatever.  Maybe he'll take
early retirement & move to Timbucktoo, and the Chron will hire a more
enlightened person who's willing to work with Austin's artists.  After all,
Nick Barbaro is the "publisher," which usually means the person who owns the
outfit.  Thus it seemed appropriate to send a letter to Nick too.

I've always liked Nick and his beautiful wife Sue ("S. Emerson Moffat");
she's a stunner.  I used to go over to Ramsey Park where the Chron softball
team had games every Sunday afternoon.  Sam was just a toddler then so I'd
take him--decked out is his basball uniform, cap & tiny glove--over with me.
Quality time with the kid.  They all got a kick out of Sam, who would run
down foul balls & hand them to somebody with serious demeanor; then he
started pitching them infield with accuracy.  People would clap & Sam loved
it; he was a "natural."  Jeff, you know what I'm talking about, as you were
a regular at these games when back in town from your Cuban jaunts.


Sue was always in the backstop bleachers & I used to imagine that her and
Nick's decision to have a child of their own (Zeke) was inspired by seeing
how cool mine was.  Every once in awhile I'd catch that maternal, protective
look in her eye when Sam was about to fall to his death, clamoring around on
the bleachers in the reckless & wild abandon of youth.  Since Nick's mother
was a Miss America, I'm sure that Zeke's got some super genes and will turn
out to be a handsome fellow:

Dear Nick,

I see with regret that your editor has refused to print my retuttal to V's
slanderous review, or even to post it on your website.  And yet he has the
nerve to say he RESPECTS me and my work.  Well, if this is how he treats an
old friend whom he "respects," I'd hate to see how he behaves toward his
enemies!

This ugly little affair is far from over, and the Chron is going to look
pretty bad because of Louis' behavior.  If you want to get an idea of the
fuss, check out comix@indra.com starting 9 Oct; my rebuttal was posted
earlier this week.  The Comics Journal, I learn, has picked up on the
controversy & will play it to the hilt.  So, Louis' big stink is now on a
national level--way beyond the city limits of Austin.  Brace yourself...

Don't you have any say at the paper anymore?  This could all have been
avoided with a little fair play--if you'd told Louis to print my defense
against V's "review," like I expected you would when I handed it to you.
Considering the nature of the charges, that was the right thing to do, don't
you think?  Instead, Louis opted to lose my friendship, along with the
respect of a great many other local creative people.  You wouldn't believe
all the supportive calls & letters I've received since the review appeared.
But Louis, in his paranoid state of mind, imagines that I've been out
beating the bushes to produce these letters of outrage at what the Chronicle
has done to me.  jaxon

PS.  Found this old issue while packing for a move.  I notice that even in
those [early] days my stuff was stuck in the back pages, but at least you
weren't calling me a racist back then!  Thanks a lot...

I was moving at the time out of a rent house I'd lived in for 13 (unlucky
number, right?) years on Bellvue St, just off Medical Parkway.  Sam had been
born in this house, spent his first 8 years there, and thought it was "his"
home.  Little guy couldn't understand why he had to up-and-leave all his
buddies on the neighborhood.  The owner was a real nice fellow who had grown
up in this house that his father (a carpenter) built when Med Pkway was
called Alice Street.  Mr. Owner gave me his 1st edition copy of the "Texas
History Movies" booklet that he's kept since it came out in 1928 when he
used it as a kiddo in school.  Gettin too old for upkeep chores, he sold
"my" house and 4 others on the block to several Yuppie ladies from Chicago;
I won't get into their sexual preference lest I get a bad "gender" rap on
top of everything else I've got going against me.  They gave me a sincere
story about how they wanted my place & the 4 other houses to be "fixed up"
so they could remain "family units," so then these families could stroll
over to Central Market and do their shopping, bla blah.  Without even
opening a can of paint, the Nice Ladies flipped the property a few months
later and doubled their money!

J. David, you may recall my bitter rants against slumlords and the Austin
real estate market at this time (and you too, Artie; hope I didn't hurt your
feelings).  Did these gals perhaps feel a wee bit guilty about how they were
using Daddy's Money?  Probably not.  Daddy would be proud when they told him
they'd turned a profit of $100,000 in 60 days on "my" house alone.  Yep, the
girl's kinda kinky, but she's got her pa's gift at getting rich without
breaking into a sweat. Austin is a Groover's Paradise, for sure, and those
dumb Texans are chickens ready for the plucking.  Keep at it, Gurls!!

For a country boy raised in an environment where land is EVERYTHING, I have
a happy-go-lucky attitude about real estate.  I'm almost as much of a
dumbshit about it as Tecumseh, that Shawnee chief who said:  "Sell a
country!?!  Why not sell the air, the clouds, and the waters, as well as the
earth?  Did not the Great Spirit make them all for the use of his children?"
After six decades of hindsight I can only reply: "Give us time, Chief.
We're working on it."  J. David tried to cheer me up (or rather, calm me
down) by remarking in his dry fashion that the last great attempt to do away
with private--as opposed to communal--property had flopped: Russia.  So I
finally took Dave's advice and became an owner of "real" estate myself.  Now
I'm just as anti-Communist as the rest of you guys, and God help anyone who
tries to mess with my tiny piece of Texas.  GROWL, SNARL...

Anyway, the issue of the Chron found during my move and passed on to Nick
was the one where I did a cartoon called "I's Lyin when I say there'll never
be another like it."  It was about a projected Condo ("Island") on the south
bank of town lake about where the Amer-Stats plant now is.  At the time
there were NO highrises on the lake--all open space with a wrap-around view
of the scenery.  The Tamale House at its Congress-First St. location was
still a popular, cheap dining spot.  Now we've got lots of tall targets for
terrorists, with more going up all the time.

Yep, Austin has Gone to Hell faster than even I--a lifelong, confirmed
pessimist/cynic-- could have imagined.  As time passes I'm beginning to feel
more like that Edward G. Robinson character in Soyulent (sp?) Green.
Somebody pleeze put me out of my misery!!!  But as I slip into Eternal Sleep
I want to see scenes of the Austin skyline and my old haunts from the
Sixties.  I am NOT READY for what Austin has become, thanks to Gary Mauro,
Kirk Watson, Daryl Slusher, and other Chamber of Commerce-type politicians
that we once imagined were Our People.  Gary, of course, allowed developers
to build Central Market & its attached Condo Row on State land--a decision
that screwed up my old neighborhood by making gentryfication inevitable.
Kirk has cut so many deals with developers & computer magnates that Austin
will NEVER recover its lost charm.  Now Daryl--former Chron "liberal" writer
who's showing us his true colors as he slops at the Public Troff--is backing
Kirk to the hilt on things like 180-foot-tall I's Lyin' condo complexes near
town lake's Lamar & Cesar Chavez junction.  If this thing slides by, you can
forget about your children/grandkids ever playing softball at the field
where so many jolly Soap-Creeker games once took place.  Dirty
bastards--traitors to the Cause, by God!  I barf every time I read some
"rave review" of Kirk's alcaldeship during the last decade.

How shall we reward Kirk?  Let's put HIS name on that new bike bridge across
the lake, so stupidly designed that no bicycle person wants to use it.
"Kirk Watson's Monument to Bad Judgment," or something like that on the
plaque marking the entrance/exit.  Typical of other accomplishments under
his watch at the wheel (like our sky-high utility bills).  Okay, the new
airport's not so bad.  At least I don't have huge jets roaring night & day
over my house anymore, flying so low that you can see the tire tread pattern
on their landing gear.  Other than that, what has he done for us Old
Austinites during his 2-term reign?  How many of our favorite places no
longer exist??   Well, Kirk says he's leaving for better things, and I hope
his ladder-climbing takes him out of Austin, maybe up Jack's Beanstalk. I
think we should turn Daryl out of office so he can go back to kissing Louis'
ass in the slushpit at the Chron.  How's that as a fit reward for his
two-faced talents?  I'd like to think "We Won't Get Fooled Again," but it
ain't likely.  Why?  Because these guys outright LIED to us about what
they'd do once elected!  No wonder people have stopped going to the polls...

And fuckin' highdollar highrises downtown that none of Us could afford to
live in even if we wanted to. DON'T LET ME GET STARTED!  Sorry real estate
Listers, but I'm hoping for another Bust before it's Too Late--while there's
still something left of what we loved about Austin.  Yes, yes, I know that
the entire surface of the planet Earth is destined to resemble the Moon's,
but I'd kinda like for it not to happen within my lifetime, you know?
YIKES!!

Neither Louis nor Nick bothered to reply, seemingly in hopes I'd forget
about this problem and it would "go away."  But Mike Ventura was reading
some of the letters/email Louis had been getting.  His column in the 27 Nov
1998 issue made reference to them, while congratulating himself for saving
the Children of the World from my racist crap.  The dumb fucker probably
still thinks ("feels?") that way:

"To go from a crucial issue [of how I find the word "closure" obscene] to,
well, a different issue: the wails of protest at my review of JJ's Lost
Cause.  Several letters pointed out, with historical references, that the
Henry repeating rifle had been invented in 1857.  I said Jackson had goofed
on this detail, while really it was me goofing.  One letter-writer said I
should apologize for this, but an honest mistake needs no apology; an
admission is sufficient.  My other judgments [against his book] stand--more
strongly, if anything.  It is interesting that no missive I read mentioned,
much less defended, Lost Cause's distorted racist portrayal of black
behavior during Reconstruction elections in Texas--a depiction very much
like D.W. Griffith's 1915 Birth of a Nation.  (So much for progress.)  If my
article prevents one parent or one teacher from handing that distortion to
one child, it was a good night's work [for me]."

Yes boys and girls, this is the type of shit you have to put up with when
you do comic books about Texas history.  Except it's not usually some
liberal, Leftist gonzo person like Ventura dumping on you, but nut-cases on
the Right.  Maybe we should elect V to the Austin City Council, so he could
get straightened-out like the Chron's DS.  Speaking of how holding office
corrupts, where's ol' Max Noffzinger these days?  Hope he's given up
twirling flowers at Lamar & 6th, or he'll be roadkill for sure...

After V's self-righteous parting shot, the furor did indeed go away.  I was
even generous enuff to send Louis a cartoon invitation card to my
Housewarming Party in the month of November over at the house we bought on
Aurora Drive, sort of Inner City Austin these days.  Lynn Howell suggested I
invite V too, so we could pitch him into the funky creek/drainage ditch that
runs behind my house.  Louis didn't show up, perhaps expecting the same
treatment--or at least a pie in his face.

Sam nows walks across Koenig Lane to high school at McCallum, where his
momma (Tina, daughter of former UT classics professor John Herington)
graduated from.  I write letters to the Amer-Stats every time some
progress-minded character advocates turning Koenig Lane into an east-west
freeway connecting IH-35 to Mopac.  They won't print them, of course, cause
the letters are too snide and "anti-growth."  I'm sure many of you
ghettoites have had the same problem with your acerbic comments being
blacklisted by the Amer-Stats, right Rodger?  I know Ol' Bruce Marshall
has...

Next-to-last installment:  The Comics Journal prints an interview with me
about the Chron's censorship, along with an accompanying review of Lost
Cause by somebody who knows what a graphic novel should attempt to do and
how I measure up to the challenge.